hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
