I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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