I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
