stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I lost the right to judge tonight
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
