No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
