Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
