Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize
