So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
