Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
