i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
is wine microwaveable?
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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