Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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