We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
