The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
