You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i just google imaged poop.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
