We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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