hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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