Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
