hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
