What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize