i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
