you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
