saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
