No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
