I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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