what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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