if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
foreskin is a definite game changer
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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