I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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