the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
