dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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