For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
