He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
is that a dick in a sweater?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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