I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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