Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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