He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
