Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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