How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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