I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
