"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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