i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
