When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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