And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
