Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
