who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The adults are the big ones right?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
