My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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