dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
