i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
