She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
