fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
