Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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