you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just invented taco cereal.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
